1st Genuine Quarrel With My Dad

It's been a long while since I've blogged. I think the blogging frenzy is dying down on everyone. But still, I feel that it's unfair especially to those who care about me. I've realized that the only effective way to actually know and get updated on everyone is through their blogs.


Something very exciting and unusual happened last night. Zan called dad to invited him for Easter this Sunday. And then the usual answer will be "See first." He said that he cannot promise. So I talked to him and our conversation turned into an argument and then a big quarrel. I never quarreled like that ever! Everything that I wanted to tell him, everything that was kept buried in me since the day he left us almost 3 years ago came out during that conversation. Usually, when we argue about God or about Mum, the thing is left hanging. But last night, I WON! I rendered him speechless at the end and from his loud raising voice from the very beginning of the conversation dimmed to a gentle soft voice when we ended it. Everything I had ever wanted to tell him even the content and things I left out in the letter I wrote during JS to him, was all spoken out. 


I feel so satisfied! =D


But then, the verse, the 5th commandment:
 Honour your father and mother and you will have a long life. 


I don't know. During the conversation, I really stood up for God all the way. Pointing out to him that he had made God so small, the God who created him, the God who saved him from death many times. I really hope that whatever I told him last night will trigger his mind because he made it quite clear that his life is meaningless and that the only reason he's alive is because he needs to find money to pay his promise of providing 1K for the family every month. Even that is so burdensome for him. Which is why he needs to go back to God. Depending on his own strength everyday is tiresome. He made that very clear. At least he acknowledges it. At least he realizes that but his solution is wrong. Hopefully our conversation hit something in his stoned heart. I hope the drought land of his heart has received at least a drop of water which will soften his heart. And at the moment, I pray that he'll be able to come for Easter! 

Lord! Please bring papa for Easter service! He needs to come back to you so that we can be a family again. Please... 

Amen.