It's Unbelievably Over!

As the title of this post states - "... UNBELIEVABLY OVER"
Time flies really fast and before you know it, the dreaded exam of our lives are over. I thought I would be very relieved and free with lots of time in my hands; but it's the other way around. Yes, I'm free from studying at the time being but I'm so jam packed with activities. Christmas for instance is the first on the list. 3 full rehearsals in a week. Of course, I don't blame Auntie Jane, we want to do our best for the Lord with the musical. Still, I would love to have more time to just "stone". 
          I thought I could go out shopping as well. But money became a factor. Just as my Bible Knowledge paper was over, I came home, looking forward to my time playing 'It Girl' on Facebook when the stupid Trojan Horse crept in and corrupted my log in password to the OS. Haiz... I'll have to wait until Pap reformat it and install KASPERSKY! 
            Right after Christmas is YouthQuake 2006. Then 5 days later, I'll be in Jeremiah School. Then 2 weeks after JS, SPM RESULTS!!! I can sense that my life now is on a constant ride in the roller coaster with lots of things to do! Soon, I'll be off to college or Form 6. Maybe then, I'll be able to find some time to myself to actually do a little "stoning". 
            Or maybe... 
Maybe I just didn't spend time doing my devotion. I have to admit, during those weeks of SPM, I was constantly praying alright and I totally surrendered everything to God. But one thing I didn't do was that I didn't do my quiet time. Unless I resume where I left of, I won't receive that peace from God that I need. I need to get back on track. Yeah... I'm gonna do that. =)

One Last Mountain!

It's the climb..!!

It's so unnatural for me to study in November because for the past 10 years, I would be enjoying by the time November arrives. But this time, this last year for me in my school days, I am forced to study in the month of November! Lord help me!
        SPM is such a sad way to end the final year and the final days in school. Why is reality so painful? This sucks! This final mountain, and I'm gonna enjoy my time in the Christmas Musical, Youth Quake and followed by 1 and 1/2 months in Jeremiah School! 
         C'mon Joanna! Suffer a little bit more! Jesus did more than this. If Jesus did his best for you, you should your best as well! Gambateh to me!! 

Creator of Outer Space

Hey guys. I don't know why in these 2 days, I got so much of inspiration to compose songs about God's creation. I wonder why now when I'm facing SPM. Weird... 

Anyways, this is my second composition. It's a more catchy one. I don't think I have the confidence to allow my bro to post the videos on youtube yet. Oh well. 

Creator of Outer Space

Written by

Joanna Thinn Mar

Verse:

Ball of fire

How did you make it?

Glowing moon in the dark

Fascinating

Sea of stars at night

My eyes are twinkling

No doubt You are 

Their creator

Pre-chorus:

Oh Lord...

Outer space is filled with Your wonders

Oh Lord...

No scientist on earth can ever crack Your code

(That's just because)

*Chorus

Your power stretches so far

I can't imagine how wide

Your brilliant, superb creation

Shows how awesome and great is my God

Bdrige*

You created:

Mercury, Venus,

Earth and Mars;

Together with

Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune,

Pluto;

Comets, Black holes,

Shooting stars,

With the

Asteroids, Meteorites

The Milky Way..! 

Original lyrics written by:

Joanna T.M. (29.10.2010)

God the Sky Painter

God the Sky Painter

BY Joanna T.M.

Verse 1:

Sun sets in the West coast

It paints the sky with shades of purple,

And red, orange, yellow and blue,

And most of the time pink ...

Verse 2:

Sun rise in the East coast

It paints the sky, oh so beautiful

Landscapes of red, volcanic sea,

And sometimes a, purple fantasy...

*Chorus

Breathtaking, so glorious

Lord Your paintings

Make me marvel at Your great, greatness

The skies are filled with Your grace and mercy

Hold on a second, pause and see

The beauty of God,

Why can't you see His great, great love

Is spread out through the sky...

Verse 3:

Storm clouds may come once in a while,

Thunder, lightning may sometimes sound

When the rain is pouring 

With the blowing wind

But the sun will shine after they leave 

Ending:

Amazing, none can compare

Rainbows stretching as a symbol

Of Your promise, Lord You are

Good, faithful and true;

Forever...

Original lyrics from Joanna Thinn Mar (28.10.2010)

Music accompaniment will be out on JozantoSA's youtube profile soon. =) 

Perfect because I'm Imperfect

Deh... (yes in Korean)
I've come to realize that my life is perfect because of all the things I have and the people that surround me. I have a roof over my head, clothes that I'm comfortable in, unlimited food to eat, education, books, tech gadgets, entertainment, family, friends and Jesus in my heart. Despite the imperfections of termite left overs in the wood frames of my house, despite the leaking pipe which is hidden from our eyes, despite my dad who doesn't know how to play his role as a real dad, I find it all balanced, perfect! Because that's just Joanna Thinn Mar. No one else could live a life you have. Yours is special, like no one else. Deh... 
          SPM is near! So let's get studying. 

C.N. Blue: Yong Hwa !!

Song: LOVE

Lead singer: Yong Hwa <3 



This song has been stuck in my head ever since I first heard it! The drummer! The beat! So COOL !! 
 How I know Yong Hwa? He acted in a Korean drama series: You're Beautiful. And he's so handsome! All the girls, reading this; agree ?? LOL! 

                   ^      OR        ^

 Today is such a lovely day. I went to school on a Wednesday. Only 22/39 were present and I don't think that we wasted our time coming to school because I found out that I have the chance to score an A- for Bio and I scored A for Sejarah!!

          Those 2 images are my result for paper 2. The first on the left is the original and the one on the right is when I deducted myself because teacher was just toooooo lenient. What I was supposed to get wrong, he gave me chance and made it correct. Because of that I originally scored 81% but after I calculated the actual points, I'm supposed to score 79%. Even though it's 2% difference but it makes my grades different. 

         *sigh... Being someone who's out for justice, I approached guru yang "berwibawa" and asked him to deduct my marks. But he refused. He said "Alah, ni trials, bagi awak chance la. Semua ini minor mistake je... Awak learn from mistake sudah okay. Kalau saya awak, saya biarkan je." 

       [Guru yang berwibawa konon!]

       My other friends were like shock to see me do that, but still teacher refused to minus my marks. All these while, I never scored an A for my History but I believe what Cous Vi Vian told me:

        " It's not that we lepak, and He still helps us, but when we realised our helpless state, and then, asks Him for help (while doing our best with the strength He gives).....A miracle happens!!!!" 

           Yes, indeed a miracle happened. I remember surviving that morning without coffee. The product of studying Sejarah without the tips till 2am+; when I reached school, I found out the tips and skipped recess to study more. I was beat by the time school ended. So yeah, God is really gracious to me and I just can't thank Him enough. Honestly, I couldn't believe my eyes when I received my paper 2. My eyes grew wide and my jaw literally dropped. "WHAT...???!! SERIOUS AH?" were the first words out of my mouth. Then teacher was like, "Kalau tak percaya, boleh datang tolak markah." But obviously he didn't want to. Kononnya, he wanted to set a record for our class to get all A's. *sigh... 

             And on my way home today together with mum, bro and 3 other boys that we had to send home from school, we were blessed with a magnificent view of the sunset.

Teasing from an 11 year old

*sigh.... 
Yes, a HUGE sigh for the "pendahuluan" of this post! 


Yesterday, (10.10.10) 
[WOW! what a really special date! and I didn't even realize that. Amazing....]


Anyways, yes, yesterday. A good friend came on an unexpected visit. Totally informed me the last minute. And we spent the entire day till 8pm + together with my mum, brother and his annoying little friend who keeps teasing!! (and not to mention, he loves my friend's hair which is according to him soft and so cool! Yuck!)
      Why teasing? Because my good friend is a guy. So what he's a guy? Can't I not make friends, good friends or even best friends with a guy?? The 11 year old kid could already think of things to tease such as "doing and saying things coincidently", just standing or sitting together and talking! Yes, I am completely pissed with that brat! And the worst part of everything is: I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING THAT WOULD MAKE THE LITTLE DUDE PAY!
       The only reason that made me have a soft spot on the small fella is because his mum just passed away last year and his dad totally doesn't take care of him properly. He doesn't cook for the kid and usually spends his nights in a snooker club nearby his house. The small kid usually goes hungry and is lazy to go out of the house, cross a busy street to the restaurant and buy food. 
      That's why; to all who are reading this. Appreciate your mums. They're the best person in your lives. Yes, the kid's real life story is sad; but let's get back to the title of this post. 


        The kid is 1/2 my height and 2 years younger than Jozanto and already knows how to say stuff like: 

• "Aww... so sweet"
• "BFGF!!"
• "Jie, is he your boyfriend?"
• "Aww! See the two look at the traffic light together!"
• "Hey! You guys say the same thing together!"
• And again: "Aww... so sweet"

I'm like... "WHAT THE .....!!!!" If I am not a true Christian, I would use the F word already. Lord forgive me for thinking of the F word. I really want to use the F WORD!!! 

AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

YOTTABYTES!!!
(frustration level = 10 to the power of ^24)

Hormones or Pure Emotions ??

Yes, pink colour for this post! 


*sigh... Do I really like that guy? Is it love? Or is just plain hormones toying with me. I always try to think scientifically whenever I have this sudden feeling of loneliness or just reminiscing about him. It helps most of the time, but on a few occasions, it doesn't. 
      The problem gets bigger as there's not only one guy but two. I'm very close to both. Or so I think I am. Maybe not. I'm not really close to both. I don't know!! This is my first blog post of my dilemma. Guy A ... Guy B. 
           I sound like someone I know already. Tera-bytes!!  I'm seventeen and a half +. Normal girls like me sure have or had boyfriends before. I'm different. I'm completely brand new. LOL!! Anyone would like to "AMEN!" to that? 
           Seeing my parents' relationship with my own eyes, I guess if there's any guy out there who actually likes me or "love" me; all the best man. Cause I'm the toughest fish to catch. 

Ambitions

• What is your ambition?
  My ambition is to be a doctor.
  
• What do you want to become when you grow up?
   A doctor!
  
• What are you planning to study after SPM?
  I'm planning to study medicine.

I'm not so sure anymore ... *sigh. SPM is just 1 and 1/2 months more to go. I'm generally 50% prepared. I can confidently declare that 5 A's are already in my hand. But the other 6 ... 

           Biology is not a problem; but my Chemistry is! Add Maths is a whole lot another matter and my Physics is up and down. My Bible Knowledge, I'll only know when Aunty Jane gives us our so called "trials". Today (Sunday, 3.10.2010) when Pastor Ashok prayed for Christian teachers in the country, I could imagine myself as a teacher. A really strict and dedicated one. It's really not a bad occupation at all. I can reach out to students and their parents as well as encourage Christian students if I ever get posted to a school which has a Christian Fellowship Club. 

             Therefore, I have concluded what I am willing to become in the future. To become a doctor takes a lot of hard work and so far I have to admit that I used to be a heavy lazy bone. With that previous attitude, it would take a miracle showered with God's over abundance of grace and mercy for me to graduate medical school. If I become a doctor, it is a noble job and people respect you for that. But when you do a mistake it's like life or death... scary. 

              Alright, so here's the list:

1. Doctor [ Paediatrician ] 
2. Teacher [ Science field & English ]  

 

                       

             

                     Yeah... If I don't see a path that leads me to the medical field, I will settle on the second choice. But why do I feel anxiety and a hint of fear when I list that down ? This is so not good... I really hope that it's my hormones that drove me to this current state of emo-ness. I shouldn't have eaten KFC for lunch.                    

I am a CONQUEROR of Add Maths!

Oh yeah...
I'm not fearful of you ...
ADD MATHS!
You ain't the boss of me, no
ADD MATHS! 
I have conquered you, you who made me gone mad!
It went well today, yeah...
I didn't break a sweat like I used too
I did more than half of you, on both papers.......


Yes, Guess what, I can score an A- in SPM! You better watch out, I'm coming strong and fast! Muahahahaha!! 

Back to school !

Believe it or not, I'm actually excited for the first time that I'm going back to school. SPM trials is just 3 more days till 7th of October and I know I'm not ready at all but yet I have the peace to face it. After today, I somehow get something from God, a motivation to do my best. Thank you, God. 

The Last Song

These 2 movies made me cry. A Walk to Remember was about love, true love. Every sentimental, romantic girl would cry watching the end parts. The Last Song however, kind of spoke to me. Ronnie, held a grudge towards her father who was divorced to her mum and left them. She hardly forgave him. Then he called Ronnie and her little brother, Jonah to spend time with him during the summer after Ronnie graduated. They did. Jonah was happy and excited and Ronnie was reluctant. She was mean to her father; being sarcastic all the time and talk about the bad stuff, indirectly blaming him for the hurts and the pain. Slowly, she fell in love but that wasn't the main point of the story. Her relationship with her father got better eventually until she found out that he had cancer at the last stage. Ronnie then decided to stay back after the summer break to take care of him while Jonah went back with his mum. 

       The thing that struck me was that even though Ronnie's parents were divorced, somehow, she managed to get back into a nice and good relationship with her father. Well, of course, her father was a sporting and protective type. Unlike me Myanmar, traditional and closed father who doesn't show love and affection. One day I dreamed that satan met me. He came in the form of my dad and I knew it instantly it wasn't my dad. I chased him away in the name of Jesus. But when he reached the back door, I was going to shut it, he then told me, if I leave, this leaves too. He was pointing towards the body he took of, my dad. I didn't understand that dream. Until it came to past. Now, my dad doesn't come home anymore. You can say that my parents are separated but not divorced. He'll only come once in a while and that is only because he had some stuff do to or things he needed to take or give us. 

          All these while, I struggled to forgive him. When I forgive, he does things that angers me and the cycle repeats itself. Like Jonah, my brother doesn't feel anything. He's very good with dad. Like Ronnie, I can seriously be sarcastic and hateful behind my dad's back. In front of him, I'll pretend to be nice. But I'll say all sorts of mean things about him behind his back. He doesn't deserve forgiveness. He doesn't deserve my mother's love. He doesn't deserve God's free gift. How he blasphemed God and talked badly about my mum. He didn't deserve it. But then, when Ronnie was good with her father, it was a little too late. He was dying. In the end, he did die. 

        I dreamed again recently about my dad. He was dying. He was lying on a hospital bed. He looked cheerful and quite energetic. I dreamed on that bed, he pretended that he died. I was so scared, so frightened. After watching The Last Song, I'm thinking twice. He owns a Myanmar shop. I hate that place! It stinks! The people there behave like, like.. I don't even know what's the best word to describe it. The only good person there is a Christian helper, Diana. I pity her that she has to work it that horrible place. I would avoid seeing my dad. Even if he comes home, I'll stay upstairs and pretend that I didn't hear him come home. Seeing my dad would create a soft spot in me for him, which I despise. But, ever since the dream about satan met me, it really did happen. 

          When dad left, mum and I had the freedom to serve God without any fear of dad yelling or scolding or even calling. When he was still around, there was a hindrance from serving God freely without fear. But then, we had to pay the consequences of serving God freely without fear; he left us. He never was a father to me at the most crucial age of my life. He just hold the title "father". Sure, when I was a child, he played with me in his sarong and taught me a little bout self defense using a rolled up newspaper. I remember when I was toddler, the 3 of us (my bro wasn't born yet) would go out for walks. I remember he held a birthday party for me when I turned 6. He called his fellow Myanmar workers to cook their style of nasi bryani. It was delicious. But that all was in the past. When I was a teenager, growing up, he wasn't there. I began to understand things. 

          He complains about his life whenever it gets tough with money. He wants my mum to work, earn big to help ease his burden. He complained a lot. He said things which really hurt me; made me feel that my brother and I were a big burden to him. I felt so many times and told God, if I didn't exist, my parents' life would be much better. Their marriage would be much happier. My brother wouldn't make a difference, now that he exists. My dad loves him. Maybe more than me. I don't know. Parents always say that they love all their children equally. But we children don't see it that way. 

           As a Christian, I know in my head I must forgive my dad or else I'll rot in hell. But it's so hard. I, I can't forget the things he said and did. He doesn't understand me. And he would always say that I don't understand him and continued to say that when I grow up, I'll understand. He places money first in his heart. Not God, not my mum, not us his kids. I'll always forgive him in my head, but the hurt in my heart, the scars are always peeled fresh from time to time and it'll become a wound again. 

           Then again, I believe deep down in my heart, I still love my dad. Despite the hurt, the pain, the emotional negligence of his love and affection, I have a soft spot for him. I cannot bear the consequences of not forgiving him. What would I answer God when I face Him one day? And now, I am really scared of that second dream about my dad. The first dream came true. Now, I really am scared. Now, I can't bear imagine that he will remain in hell forever. Forever is a very long time... It never ends. 

            "Lord, I really want to forgive him. I just forgot how. It's been so long and so much has happened. Help me. You know my heart, deep down in my heart. You know, what I really am capable of doing. Help me find the strength and courage. I want to forgive like You did on the cross. In Jesus' name I pray: Amen..."

To those who read this, I hope that it will speak to you too. Whoever that you find hard to forgive, settle it now, before it's too late. God bless... 

Depapepe

I am officially a fan of Depapepe! 

Their music is just so nice... Feel kind of jealous but I was taught the piano not the guitar. After SPM, I'm gonna learn one of their songs. That's the first thing on my to-do list after SPM. 

Romeo X Juliet (You Raise Me Up)

Have you ever heard of You Raise Me Up in Japanese before? It sounds so wonderful. But the lyrics from this anime has been altered. It isn't the original one but more towards a William Shakespeare kind of poetic lyrics. Enjoy...

Original / Romaji Lyrics
urunda hitomi no oku ni kawaranu kimi no sugata "doko made sekai wa tsudzuku no" todaeta hibi no kotoba
kogoeru arashi no yoru mo mada minu kimi e tsudzuku oshiete umi wataru kaze inori wa toki wo koeru
kasunda chihei no mukou ni nemureru hoshi no souwa "akenai yoru wa nai yo" to ano hi no tsumi ga warau
furueru kimi wo dakiyose todokanu kokuu wo aogu kikoeru yami terasu kane kimi eto michi wa tooku
kogoeru arashi no yoru mo mada minu kimi e tsudzuku oshiete umi wataru kaze inori wa toki wo koeru
kogoeru arashi no yoru mo mada minu kimi e tsudzuku oshiete umi wataru kaze inori wa toki wo koeru
inori wa toki wo koeru

       English Translation

In the depths of my tear-filled eyes, Is your everlasting beauty. "How far does the world go?" Those words from our bygone days. Even on those freezing, stormy nights, Though you are still out of sight, I continue on. Please tell me, ocean-crossing winds, That my prayers will pass through time. Beyond the misty horizons, Stars are fabled to lie. "Dawn will surely follow every night." The sins of my past laughs. I try to embrace you trembling with uncertainty, But I look up at the empty sky beyond reach. I hear the chime that illuminates darkness, Showing me that the path to you is still far. Even on those freezing, stormy nights, Though you are still out of sight, I continue on. Please tell me, ocean-crossing winds, That my prayers will pass through time. Even on those freezing, stormy nights, Though you are still out of sight, I continue on. Please tell me, ocean-crossing winds, That my prayers will pass through time. My prayers will pass through time.

Being Sick

Being sick is the last thing on earth I want now. It's the worst feeling of all! I'm blurrier than my friend Cally (who is usually blur to jokes) when I am sick. I felt completely useless when I am sick. Even yesterday, during Youth meeting; I was a serious blur case. Didn't like the feeling at all. I'm trying to recollect my bearings and sort out my life. 

        I ponteng school today. Coughing... Runny nose... major HEADACHE!! It's impossible to concentrate in school. And Allysha's visiting us in school today and I'm didn't go. I already prepared her. haha... she's not as convincing as she used to. My health is more important. I need to rest as much as I can. 

SPM pressure, tension and many more...

I know this is normal for every single SPM candidate, but I'm special ok?
I am built in with a nature to relax. I try my best to study everyday unlike other people who only studies a week before exams. Well, actually, I was like them. But after my mid-term exam this year, I did TRY my best to study everyday. And I did manage to study everyday. And just because I didn't study for today and watched Smallville on my laptop during my free time in the afternoons this whole week; she's now at this moment, scolding and nagging me like as if I've committed such a huge sin. Each time I touch my laptop, she'll on her nag switch automatically. It's like a sensor. I know she wants the best for me. But, she is spreading to everyone who is above me like the counselors about how I'm not studying. Hello... pressure much? And when I complained about pressure, she answered: "It's not that I give you pressure, you asked for it." 
        Wow... very comforting. Teachers in school are giving pressure especially when they target you into the top 30 who are expected to score straight A's. All the pentadbir(s) in my school are eying on me and my friends. Especially the PK Akademik. Teachers, mum, people who mum told them bout me. I'm like trying my best to study. You see, I'm even banned from watching TV! I obeyed that rule didn't I? If you know me through and through, I used to say I can't survive without TV. And she looked past that. Argh! I just don't know what to do now. If I don't achieve what people expect me to achieve, straight A's; then am I a failure? *sigh... 

Lip Gloss

My name is Joanna Thinn Mar. 
I grew up with a mum who never bothers about beauty but only decency. 
I grew up wearing simple clothing. 
Fashion of clothes, shoes and accessories were never discussed in my family. 
Make-up was banned ever since I knew about them.
As I grow up, I was exposed to all these. 
I really feel inspired to try something new, change my style.
But...
It's so hard and I'm not brave enough. 
So, I'll start small.... Really small.
My 1st step:


Owning a lip gloss. 


The funniest thing I think now, is that, I have no time to go out. But my mum has because she fetches kids from school. And so, my first lip gloss will be chosen by my mum. Hilarious indeed. ha.ha.ha... swt-_-"
Hopefully, she chooses something of my type. I can trust aunty Elaine or aunty Swee Hong but never my mum on make-up. To those who know my mum, you should know why. So I'm sending her out to my my first lip gloss by faith. Yes, faith. God bless, I hope I made you laugh today. 

couldn't take my eyes of him

Okay... I know the title sounds quite a "hopeless romantic" phrase, but literally; I couldn't take my eyes of this guy. 
He was involved in the accident which took place around 3 months ago where 5 were in a Wira car. 3 got killed, 1 escaped with minor injuries and he was in a critical condition. His name is Thee Kai Yang. I was so worried actually. Before this accident happened, 3 of our schoolmates was killed in road accidents. 
   We grew up together, sort of. Same school since primary till now. When my friend announced to me about the accident, she didn't tell me straightforwardly but my heart stopped when she said that people died in that accident. 
        He survived and was in the hospital for more than 2 months. He just came back to school this week. And after school today, I was walking with my friend and I saw him with the familiar yellow Digi bag. I was thrilled to see him. Usually I would breeze walk and zoom pass all the slow moving pedestrians in front of me. Today however, I walked on a slow and steady pace behind him. Observing him walking and how he interacted with this buddies. 
        Really, I didn't take my eyes of him until we reached a point where I needed to turn right to my mum's car and he kept walking straight to his car. He really lost a lot of weight and the pants that he once tighten to fit to his legs, looked baggy on him. He is literally a walking stick. But then, I'm hoping that he experienced something spiritual when he nearly died that morning. I watched that video from a CCTV of a factory, and the impact with the lorry... the lorry overturned. 
God gave him a second chance and I feel a prompting to talk to him. 
       Seriously, I couldn't take my eyes off him. 

Akegarasu Haya Prize Essay Contest

*sigh...
What on earth should I write? Theme: Why my mother is so important to me. I have no idea so far. But the prize is 100 000 yen which is = RM3655. It's not like I have the chance of winning right? Or maybe I have that is why I still am not giving up on this thing. The deadline is tomorrow and it was only today that my English teacher received the letter from JPS. Very efficient; I can see that! Since I'm submitting it on the last minute, I would need to write something of a true story about my mum and yet very creative and bombastic but not full of jargons. Hmm... What should I write? 

Journal for my future husband

I was inspired to write a journal to my future husband starting yesterday. It sounded so fun. Actually, it is still fun. Whoever he is out there, I feel that we are already connected by God. Aunty Elaine has advised me to list out the requirements that I need/want in my future husband and after so long, I finally listed them down. I have 14 altogether and will not post on this blog :P
            Then, I got this incredible idea to write a journal to my future husband. It's so hard to call him. I'm have no clue at all whether is he in my life right now or maybe I'll meet in later on in life. Life is very unpredictable. God is giving me suspense now as I wait who is the one that he planned for me. To all you girls out there, list the requirements that you want/need in your future husband. Pray about it. Or maybe, you can start your very own journal for your future husband. 
            For me, that journal that I will compile as I grow and then meet him, will be the most precious wedding gift anyone could ever give to her spouse and vice versa. I wonder whether my future husband is also writing a journal to me at the same time... It would be very nice and amazing if he also does that. Goodness, life seems so exciting now. LOL!! 
           As for now, 145 days till SPM. I gotta focus on this first at the same time trust God that He is preparing my future husband for me. I look forward to that day we meet, my future husband. 

Youth Sunday

Totally a blast!! 
All glory to God. However, we did make a huge mistake regarding the attendance of the people. Why aren't the ushers doing their job properly?? I asked them to count! Count properly! Nevermind. We shall not do that again. Took the ushers so lightly. *sigh... Shouldn't have. Anyway... everything went well. I'm quite happy with what we achieved today. Hopefully through today, some will change and be more responsible in the days to come. Jesus, I surrender all!! 

No more cold treatment!!

Stop treating me so coldly! It's not my fault that I'm good at English. Why? Are you jealous whenever Pn. Mazlina calls out my name because I scored full marks? Who asked you not to score full marks. Do you want me to get a  B? Will you be satisfied then? I'm just doing my best. Not my fault when I become the teacher's pet. I didn't ask for it. Stop being so prejudice every time English comes. Just read more! Write more! Talk more proper English. Ish!! 

Dreadful 1st Day in School !

If you were to ask me: "How was your first day in school?"

I would answer: "Dreadful. A total waste of time!" 

And I'm sure you would ask in surprise: "Why?" 

I would reply groggily: " Because we spent the whole school session in the school hall listening to a terrible Modern Maths Malay teacher teaching us everything in BM! Even the paper sheets she prepared were in BM! When she teaches, the sometimes doesn't know that proper term in English. Oh yeah... she used to mark Maths SPM papers in 2004-2006. But those years, the subject was still taught in BM! C'mon. We Science students were placed right at the back of the hall. Most of us can't see a thing on the white board and even our Malay friends can shout, GUNA INGGERIS. TAK FAHAM LA!! Yeap... our beloved Ketua Pengawas swore not to come for this whole week if we are being treated like that." However the school already warned us that if we are absent for no reason for 3 days straight, Surat Amaran pertama wil be issued out. 
         Yes, most of us did our own work or stared off into space in our own world. How could our school invite such a teacher to teach? 5 classes were joined together from 5 SN 1 - 5 Tassawur. Those very privileged people are the ones who were placed at the front. They will suffer when they sit for SPM because whatever they learned are in BM while En. Muzikir who also teaches them, teaches in English. If they are going to ask for a feedback, I'm very very very 100% sure that the 2 Science classes will give BAD ones. Especially about the language used to teach. Argh!!  

School... ARGH!!

Wow... holidays are over. NNNOOOOO!!!

Why does it go by so fast?! WHY?! 
Dreading the day I'll get my Physics paper. I hope I pass. That's the only paper I totally screwed up. And holidays were so packed, I didn't have the time to finish all my homework let alone to study. 
       Well, planned a pretty tight schedule with mum and hopefully, with determination, I'll be able to follow it strictly. Lord, help me! I'm a student first, before a president. I gotta do what I gotta do first. Earn a scholarship. For both my parents' sake. And to prove to my dad that God is sovereign and He does provide all our needs. 

Family Camp

What a totally awesome feeling and experience!! 

 forming of rain clouds on the way to Genting

ride to Genting in Uncle Johnny's car

We went for 'Excursion' first to Strawberry Park. We went there as a group and parked the cars in a carpark nearby. So Uncle Johnny parked beside a real FERRARI.

 Heng Wei as a model, posing beside the Ferrari. 

In the Strawberry Park...

 
look at the size of that hibiscus! It's almost as big as my hand!

Back at the apartment...

 the view of a valley from our room

We had fellowship night and this is a presentation by the kids

After every night's session, we youths will hang out and play truth and dare. It was seriously fun and funny. Amazingly I could wake up the next morning without feeling tired.

Charmaine was dared to kiss Ern Yi's hair. LOL! 

The last morning there, Tevin went upfront for the first time in his life to give a testimony. 

HAHA!!! Pastor was just standing beside him. 

It's good. 

     Besides just having fun out there, I also learned a lot from Pastor Daniel's sessions. It has really opened my eyes to how I should live my life as a Christian. I've really grown and matured more in my walk with God. That was the most significant thing I experienced there. I never thought church camp would be so fun. Thank God for that person who sponsored us there and for Uncle Johnny who offered us the ride there. I will never forget this experience. 

Peace...

Justin Bieber

            I've been on youtube so many times and I've checked Justin Bieber out.

               And the comments... people are just seriously jealous of him because Usher and Justin Timberlake were fighting over for who will sign him a record contract. Seriosuly... My mum said his voice isn't broken yet that's why he sounds like a girl now. Honestly, if I didn't know his name, I did assume that it was a girl singer. And that was why I was weirded out with the lyrics. LOL! Anyways... I like 2 of his songs and MV. I like it not because of the dude but the rhythm and music. It's just so catchy. 

JPS: Physics

          I've never felt so bad in my entire life. After Physics today, there was this really unpleasant bothersome feeling of NO peace in my heart. I felt guilty of now studying and doing early preparation. It's seriously a terrible feeling. All I can ask now if for God to have mercy on me and that I won't fail my Physics paper because I've aimed to pass every paper at least 40 above. *sigh...
Lord, have mercy on me!!

May the 24th

*sigh...
I'm very sure that I've lost 20 marks for Moral exam today. Hopefully I still have the chance of getting an -A. The horrible Add Maths exams is tomorrow, ICT and Bio on Wednesday and PHYSICS on Thursday. What an intense week! God have mercy on me...



      Oh yes, we went for GDOP yesterday and boy, was it GENG! 13 000+ Christians from all denomination in the Klang Valley gathered together to pray for the nation. When we worshiped together, when I saw the thousands of hands lifted up to God, I just can't help but to cry from the moment I stepped into the indoor stadium and seeing the thousands of empty seats being filled slowly as the time flew from 6 - 6.40pm. The worship led by DUMC was seriously spirit-filled.


       Juwita Suwito and Patrick Leong back-up sang. And the camera men spotted Jacklyn Victor in the congregation. Our former badminton double specialist, Lee Wan Wah carried the torch while another Malaysian athletic carrying the Malaysian flag as they lead the runners in pairs representing all 14 states of Malaysia. It was amazingly grand! 


       I wished I'd taken some photos but my handphone battery power was left with a bar. I shall get  the photos from my brother soon. The website is also available.. argh!! I can't remember the website. Well, I'll find it out sooner or later.



       Well, now I'm off to nap and set myself ready to study Add Maths and Biology and ICT. Alright... chill Joanna. You can do it!