My Dilemma

The heart the core of emotions

That sets the soul in devotion

To anything the heart is compelled

To anything the soul can retell 

The mind the pool of logic

Where wisdom and knowledge work their magic

Retaliates and objects many things

Which includes the heart's borne feelings

Oh how I am torn deep within

Both torn in and between

What the mind has secured

Versus the voice of the heart that endured

The man who portrays the ideal

Or the man who is a potential ordeal

Both God allowed to grow

Yet only one will glow

And that in time, he will glow brightly~

AROUND THE CORNER

Many things are around the corner now.
First up the list is my finals. *sigh... I'm not ready yet and I think I'm preparing for it but I don't feel like I'm preparing for it. So many things are happening, so far since the 1st of October, I will have been to Logos Hope for 3 times. I feel a hint of emo-ness in this post. 
I have signed up for Maaduu. A website that shows legal and licensed Korean dramas for free. I thought I would enjoy watching a few but I'm actually quite bored of it already. They're quite some old dramas like Winter Sonata and Boys Over Flowers and Full House but I just don't seem to have the interest to watch them at the moment. It's really quite weird for me. Haha! It's actually a very good thing, come to think of it. I'll be able to concentrate more on my studies. I think my thought ans imagination is still lingering on the novel I found in my school library title: Shiver. It's a werewolf story. It's quite simple for my understanding of English usage and it's obviously addictive. Good thing I have't got my yellow card to borrow fictional and non-fictional books or else I would have spent my time reading finish the book. 
            Thank God that I wasn't sleepy at all during Maths tuition. That was really a first for me since I started tuition in August. Hmm... I wanna get a camera!

I finally have a DREAM

Whoa...
It's been seriously a long time since I have the "semangat" to write up a post.
Well, I'm listening to one of the 8 CDs I bought from Logos Hope; Kathryn Scott: I BELONG. I like her album. She has a really extraordinary voice. Pop and country type of voice blended together. The music's pretty too =)
All right, to the point I'm writing tonight. I finally have a Dream. A real dream. Something that will genuinely boost my spirits each time I think about it and something that motivates me to do my best in my studies. I want to serve on the Logos Hope.

Yeah, indeed, hope starts with you.

Logos Hope has berthed at the Star Cruise terminal in Port Klang and I've already been there twice in 4 days. Lovely isn't it? Haha! I just love the place, the ship! I made a new friend, well 2 exactly through my bubbly and blur friend Eugenie. One in particular has caught my interest as in she really has a unique personality and her passion for God is so deep that it even made me wanna be so passionate for God myself. Her name's Alyssa. And I'm super thankful that God has brought her into my life. I don't know when I've been crazy about Logos Hope. I guess it was because they came to my church last year and ministered to us. And I've been researching about it ever since together with OM Ministries. My heart for mission just grew and the passion there expanded.
        I really, really, really, really... x10 desire to serve on board that ship! 3 main reasons why I wanna be on that ship:

1. Staying on board that ship is a stepping stone to adapt myself to the mission environment. Eg: Limited source of water, living with 45 other nationalities.
2. Meeting new people where ever it berths. I love to explore the world and not just be stuck in Malaysia. It's time for me to go beyond the horizon.
3. I will be able to be part of something BIG: God's ministry. Logos Hope can seriously impact lives all over the world, where ever it berths. I want to be part and I want to contribute to that work of God has started with this ship.

There. This is my dream. I am completely honest and sincere for something that I really, really, desire for once in this entire life of mine. The thing is, I feel like my life at this point is starting to be like the ones in the movies where the parents object or there are many obstacles blocking the way. Well, I'm starting to pray about it now. And I'm praying that God will provide the finances and myself, physically, mentally and most importantly spiritually. Solely focusing on Jesus cause it's always about Him. 

Berthed beside the Star Cruise Virgo on Saturday (1/10)

Bro posing on the poser board.
As an engineer working in the engine room, I presume.

Highlight No. 1

It is honestly the most painful and horrifying and at the same time most memorable experience I ever had in my entire 18 years of life. Dengue. Spent 5 days in the hospital with having to take blood every six hours or so. But my first night in the hospital was almost as hell. There's this houseman punjabi doctor on call and he was the only doctor there in the ward. He had to take my blood test again just after like 15 minutes ago, I took another blood test. Seriously! He had big hands and was struggling to find my vein. After 5 attempts of poking and no blood coming out into the syringe, me squeaking on the verge of crying, my brother and mum's tense reaction, he finally agreed to take my blood from my hand instead from my arm. Imagine a mini knife stabbing your arm. That's how it was. 
          It all started with fever. Up and down. Until it got too long to be in my body so mum finally decided to send me to the clinic to take blood test. That result came out showing my platelet counts less than 150 000 (mine was: 110 000). So doctor said to come again the next day to see whether it increases or decreases. If it decreases, I'm going into the hospital. And well, obviously it decreased, to 77 000! So that Friday evening, I was admitted into the hospital. The IV tube insertion wasn't painful as many who experienced it described. It was very quick and I only felt a prick. Unlike the intensive blood tests during those 5 days. I came out looking like a drug addict who has blue-black marks on the arm. (That was what my good friend told me when she saw me in tuition)

          

            I feel so proud looking at this picture. Haha!
Besides all the physical stuff, I thank God for allowing me to be in the hospital. For the first time in all my remembrance, my dad stayed back during lunch hour to feed me cause I was too weak to eat myself and mum went back home to rest and do a few chores. I also got to observe the housemen and Medical Officers and the specialists work cause I, myself will one day have to work like them. Walking all the time from bed to bed, writing down observations based on the patient's conditions and kena scolding from your supervisor medical officer for giving your firm opinion. Yeah... Am I ready for that? At this moment, no. I am not. But if it's God's will for me to continue my studies in the medical field, then He will prepare me in every aspect: physically, emotionally and mentally. 
            This is the highlight of my life for the past 2 months since I've blogged. There is another highlight though. Will blog about it later. That one is so far the most amazing discovery of my 18 years of life. Just in 1 sentence: I have found another human being whose race is exactly like mine and my bro: Dad's a Myanmarese and Mum's a Chinese. Plus, he's a Christian too! XD

Restarting - Refreshing!

Being in Form 6 is a blast, I tell you. Especially when I decided to be a librarian. Being a librarian in High School Klang is no joke. We Form 6 students are assigned to specific tasks and I was placed in a group in charged of movie shows. I was selected as the secretary of that group and secretarial work is also a NO joke and NO play-play job. I handle every single thing that has to do with paper from letters, movie schedules, duty schedules and also contacting group members for meetings and reminders. Library month has started 3 days ago and so does everything else. Movie shows are going through smoothly so far, THANK GOD! 
             We have earned nearly to RM400 now which is quite a progress. Although we couldn't match to our seniors achievement which is RM300 the first day itself. I tried finding a picture of my school's library on the net but it seems that High Klang isn't that famous after all. Haha!
             Being super busy and tired ever since I decided to be a librarian, my quiet time spent with God has also decreased and I tell you, I've noticed that my behaviour has become more and more ungraceful and joyless; which is the total opposite thing of a Christian. I should be shinning not dimming darker and darker. That is why I've got to get back on track again. No matter whether my homework is piling up or not. I've gotta make time for God. Restarting and refreshing now... Lord, Your grace is enough!  

I'm A Librarian

Wow... It has been half a month since I've blogged. That shows that I'm either super busy or just plain lazy. Hehe... Well it's a combination of both. I'm so relieved that Youth Sunday in WMCK is over. I have received many, many, many good feedbacks about the presentation. ALL GLORY TO GOD! You must be blur... 


I was in charged of the presentation for Youth Sunday. I planned every single detail about the mini musical skit. From the script, to the songs used, to the video shooting and the dance moves. Besides that, dear Aunty Jane also helped to improvise and edit the script and help enhance the quality of the acting, dancing and narrating. Video shooting was a blast! So was the photo shoot. All our effort and hard work paid off. If only I could post up the slide show on this blog. Hmm...


I want to personally give credit to Gang Ming Jer for the excellent humourous line of Mrs. Young to Kyle~
Kyle: But, but, I'm scared of blood.
Mrs. Young: Blood, blood, blood. HAHA! Blood. You do chef also same thing. You do chicken chop, mutton chop; you chop the chicken and mutton all also got blood. 


SUPER FARNEY!! In case you're blur, the video's gonna be up soon, in a week's time. It's just so funny I was recording it and I was using all my will power not to laugh. That's the part on Youth Sunday. Will blog properly about it when the videos are out. Then you'll know what I'm blogging about. Haha!


Library.... School Library. They are killing me man! I was elected as the secretary of my group which is in charged for "Tayangan Filem" during the Library Month and I have to do nearly everything! (except the tickets) Contacting the members, hold meeting, type minutes, type letters, arrange the movie schedules and duty schedules and my laptop has been honoured to be used during the movie shows. Which means I have to bring it to school everyday for the next 3 weeks! Argh! Plus, I have Bio test tomorrow and I'm not completely prepared and I don't know how it's gonna be like. 
            One thing I realized throughout the weeks, God has been gracious and merciful to me. My Chemistry teacher has found favour in me. I started Maths T tuition last Thursday and Mr. Chan who is the teacher also a personal friend of the family sponsored my tuition fees for the whole term. How awesome can God get? And His protection on me all these while when I walked across the Klang bridge to church, back and forth and walking to tuition as well. God is indeed good! 


I will blog more in the future. Till then, these are the things I've gone through over the past few weeks. 

Life At The Moment

It's the school holidays now and it doesn't feel like the break I used to have after SPM. Haha! Of course it wouldn't be like that. My schedule's pack with loads of activities. 2 activities down at the moment: Photo shooting and my Driving's QTI test. (I passed!) Would have my P license after the holidays are over. Pray-tell I'll pass the real thing with the JPJ people. 
         2 unusually exciting things happened. No. 1: Weldon's birthday (ex-ketua of SOS). Thanks for Foon Yoong (a.k.a our ex-secretary) for organizing a mini youth outing to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, we had loads of fun!

 It's a good movie. I laughed, quite a lot. 23 of us wanted to watch but there were only 16 tickets. So Yoong, Cally, Juan Wyn, Joel, Tevin and Wei Zheng sacrificed. (I can't remember who was the other one...) Before the movie we had lunch at Govin's. (I hope I didn't misspell) It's a Northen Indian Restaurant. Good food... Yum... 

My beloved SOS Youth. I will surely miss them in 2 years time. Oh well, and then it's the photo shoot which happened yesterday. I cannot show any of the pictures yet, but the video, I can. I think. Still, thinking about it. It was incredibly funny. That's all for now.